Bibbidi Bobbidi Boutique
As we approached the castle in the Magic Kingdom, I was not sure I could do this. I wanted to, but . . . but I couldn't. Could I? Holding onto Mom's hand I looked up at her as she led us up the ramp on the right.
My stomach felt funny. My legs were weak. If Mommy wasn't leading me along, I would be frozen in place. What was I doing? I could be riding It's A Small World again, but NO, I had to pick this as my Disney wish. Mommy and Daddy had been very clear, on the Disney trip I could have one wish. They said, "Disney was where Dreams come true."
I went through the Disney World Information over and over. I watched the DVD and read the Kid's Guide to Disney World. I kept coming back to one activity. It looked like a lot of fun; getting dressed up all fancy and spending the morning with just Mommy and me. Getting to spend the morning like all the Princesses, it would be like I was in all those Disney movies. I could be Snow White's or Belle's little sister. I so wanted to do this, but I knew Mommy and Daddy would never let me.
I tried not to let them know I was repeatedly looking at the Princess Tea Party, but they kept walking in on me staring at pictures of the Tea Party. Dad was the first one to say something, "You know that is for little girls in fancy dresses, if you pick that we will have to buy you a fancy dress." Dad said this with a smile, and just walked out of the room.
Mom was the next to comment when I was looking at the web page information about the Tea Party, "Oh, isn't that lovely. I haven't had a tea party since I was a little girl. Too bad you will never pick that, it looks like fun." Without thinking, I asked about what one does at a tea party. I had never had tea, it was a grown-up drink. Do little girls drink real tea with their Mommies?
"Are you ready," Mom interrupted my thoughts?
"What," I asked as I came out of my thoughts and realized I was standing directly in front of the castle, staring blankly at the opening into the castle.
"We don't have to do this if you don't want to," Mom said getting down to my level.
"But I want to go to the Disney Girl's Perfectly Princess Tea Party. I do Mommy."
"Honey," Mommy hugged me. "We can go to the Tea Party with you dressed the way you are. We don't have to do a Princess Make Over. I know Daddy said Tea Parties are only for Little Girls in fancy dresses, but you don't have to wear a dress."
"Tea Parties are for girls Mommy. Girls at the Tea Party are treated like Royalty. They get a cool My Disney Girl Doll dressed as Princess Aurora. Sleeping Beauty even comes with accessories. The girls get pretty ribbon tiaras and bracelets. All the boys get is a crummy crown and bear. I want to go as a girl Mommy. You and Daddy promised I could. Please Mommy, I really want to."
Mommy smiled and hugged me again. "Okay Tony. For the rest of the day you are my little girl. If this is what you really want for your Disney Wish, then let the Disney Magic begin. Inside this castle, my little boy Tony will turn into my little girl Toni, with an ‘I'."
Before I knew what was happening, we had walked through the castle to the other side and were standing in the entrance way to the Bibbidi Bobbidi Boutique. It looked like we had just walked into the Princess part of the castle. Everyone I saw was a girl, then there was me.
"Hello Fairy Godmother," My mother said talking to the lady at the podium. "We have an appointment for little Toni here. She has a Tea Party with Princess Aurora later this morning. Although she enjoys being a tomboy as you can see, she wants to be a princess for the Tea Party. I don't know if you can do anything about her short hair, but we would appreciate any help you can provide."
My short hair? What was she talking about? Dad had been complaining for two months now that I needed a haircut, but all mom would do was cut just in front of my eyes. She kept telling me that she didn't have time to cut all of my hair.
"Well," The Fairy Godmother at the podium said. "I see according to the reservation you have ordered the Castle Package. My Fairy Godmothers-in-training will work their magic to make the princess inside her shine through. We do have hair extensions you can get if you want more hair to work with to make that perfect princess look. Well Toni, are you ready to pick out your new Princess dress?"
With a big smile on my face I looked up at Mom and asked, "Can I Mommy?"
"First is the dress, every little princess needs the perfect dress," Mommy gestured towards the dresses with a slight bow.
Exploring the different possible outfits, I started walking around wide eyed and in a daze. I walked around the room twice, touching various dresses and accessories. I didn't know there would be so many different choices.
Back when we were planning the trip, I had resisted saying what I really wanted for my Disney Wish, and eventually just said, "I guess the pirate cruise."
Mom didn't believe me and pushed to find out what I really wanted. Reluctantly I told her about the Tea Party, telling her I couldn't go because I was a boy. When she pushed that I could go as a boy, I sheepishly admitted I didn't want to go as a boy. That night I lay in bed hugging my teddy bear listening to Mommy and Daddy arguing over what to do about my Disney Wish. I knew I was in trouble and fell asleep crying. Several days later, Dad came up to me while I was playing with my Lego's and told me I could go to the Tea Party if I really wanted to wear a dress and pretend to be a sissy girl.
This thought stuck in my mind as I stood there, actually inside Cinderella's castle, looking all around at the Pink, Blue, Yellow, Green, and White dresses everywhere. Frills, lace and ruffles on dresses Mommy said I could wear. I was still having a hard time believing Mom and Dad were really going to let me wear a dress and go to the Tea Party. Sparkling shoes, wands, long white gloves, and tiaras lining the walls. Wide eyed and gaping mouth I just floated around the room in a daze.
Standing in front of Aurora's pink dress, Mom interrupted my thoughts, "A pink Aurora outfit Toni?"
"What?" startled, I looked up at her.
"Do you want to get the pink Aurora outfit for your Princess dress?"
"No . . . I mean . . . I . . . ," putting my head down, my reply could barely be heard, "Yes."
Mom quickly went into gear, finding a dress the right size, shoes, a purse, a brush, and even getting socks with lace and a little pink ribbon on them. We headed over to the changing room, "the Royal Chambers." The Fairy Godmother checked what we had and found us some Chambers to change in. Mommy came in with me, and while I got undressed, she got everything ready. I was standing there just in my underwear, when Mommy went into her backpack and pulled out a few more things.
"Underwear off too Toni," Mommy said as she pulled out a package of Princess Panties. "Go ahead and pick which ones you want to wear."
"But those are girl underwear."
"Yes Toni, you are my little girl princess today, right?"
I nodded yes, as she continued. "Then let's get you all dressed up like a princess, including princess panties. A princess wouldn't want to be wearing yucky boy underwear. She would want fancy princess panties."
I took off my underwear and picked up the package of panties. Pink, yellow, blue, white, and green panties were in rolls. Walking my fingers along the top of the rolls, I stopped on the blue Cinderella panties. Blue is a boy color, I should pick these. I looked at my mom, who was collecting my boy clothes from the floor and then at the dress, I quickly took out the pink Aurora panties and put them on. They felt different than my regular underwear.
"Put this on next Tony," Mommy interrupted my thoughts noticing me feeling the outside of the panties. She handed some clothes to me.
"What is this for," I asked in confusion holding up what looked like a long sleeveless teeshirt?
"You have to wear a slip under your dress sweetie. A princess wouldn't be dressed right without one."
I was confused. I was being asked to put on a dress to wear under my dress? I didn't understand. There was a lot I didn't understand however, as I was experiencing emotions I had never had before. I put the . . . slip . . . on with no further question. It felt very strange. The panties were one thing, but this, this . . . I had never worn anything that felt like that before.
Noticing me feeling the slip and turning from side to side, mom smiled as she said, "A special Mother and Daughter Tea Party, needs a special slip made of satin."
The socks were next. These were also different than any I had ever worn. Mom pulled them all the way up, and then turned the top down. She made sure the little pink bow on each was facing out. The shoes were pink with little shiny circles all over them, mom called them sequins. I thought they looked like slippers with extra sparkles and a picture of Aurora on them in a heart shape. Then Mom put the dress on me, which was zipped up the back. What . . . I quickly realized that I was trapped. I couldn't get out of the dress without help. To make matters worse, Mom had me turn around and she tied a bow in the back. Did I really want to do this?
I knew I shouldn't be wearing a dress. I knew I shouldn't be wearing anything pink. I shouldn't even be in a place like this. I knew all of this was wrong. My brain was telling me to quickly take it all off and run away. Feeling the dress, lace, and some material on the dress I had never felt before, I didn't want to take any of it off. For years at school programs and on picture days, I would see girls wearing pretty dresses, and now, I finally had a chance to wear one too.
"Toni . . . Toni?" Mommy interrupted me with a questioning look as she finished picking everything up to leave the changing room.
I looked at her for a second with a dazed look, then down at the dress. It was puffing out. I couldn't even see my feet. As I ran my fingers along what looked like vines all over the weird outer layer of fabric covering the skirt, a huge smile slowly appeared. This was the same material that was going down my arms as sleeves for the dress. I turned from side to side and the smile got even bigger.
As we left the changing room, I finally got to see myself for the first time in a mirror. I was definitely a very strange sight. From the neck down I saw a small pretty princess in a beautiful prink dress. I loved it. I was a princess. Unfortunately, I saw a boy's head on that princess. My cheeks turned as pink as the dress. Dad was right. I was just a boy in a girl's dress and everyone would know it. I was ready to tell mom I had changed my mind, I didn't want to look like a freaky, sissy in a dress.
"Okay Princess Aurora," a Fairy Godmother-in-training said coming up behind Tony. "Time to get your make-over, are you ready?"
I turned looking for my mom. Finding her off to the side, I looked at her, unsure of what to say or do. Not answering the Fairy Godmother-in-training, I got behind Mommy and hugged her.
"Sorry, Little Toni here can be shy at times. She doesn't usually wear dresses, and I am sure that is making things even harder for her at the moment. She doesn't even wear a dress at Christmas. Yes Fairy Godmother, we are ready. I am sure she will feel more comfortable once she sees how beautiful she looks with her new hairstyle."
"Princess Toni, you look so lovely. This way your highness," the Fairy Godmother bowed, gesturing the direction to go.
Mommy took my hand and headed for the hairstylists. The dress felt strange on my legs as I walked. Mom and the Hairstylist had a discussion of what they could do with the short hair. I climbed up into the stylist's chair, and a pink smock was put around my neck. Although I wanted to tell Mommy to make them stop, I wasn't a sissy, I also wanted to get my hair done and have make-up put on. I quickly found myself being toted over by two Fairy Godmothers-in-training. One lady worked on my hair and another one my fingernails. My back was to the mirror, so I couldn't see what they were doing. I sat there looking at a collection of crowns in glass domes and what was happening to my fingernails. Every now and then a third lady with a camera would come by and take my picture.
Knowing I would never get another chance like this, ever again, I tried to take in everything that was happening. They were using gel and hairspray in my hair. My fingernails were being painted pink to match my dress. It was all happening too fast though, I wished only one lady would be working at a time. Part of me was thinking I still wanted to tell Mom to make them stop, but everyone was calling me a girl and treating me like a girl. I felt special.
My thoughts drifted to what Mommy had reassured me about. Whenever dad started in on me, she would say that once I was dressed as a girl, everyone would treat me like one. Dad didn't think so, saying that no matter what, I would still just be a sissy boy in a dress and everyone would know it. I saw myself when I got out of the dressing room, he was right. Why was I letting this go on?
I thought back to when dad kept repeating his comments over and over again. Mom told him there was a simple solution to the problem, if he didn't want his son to look like a boy wearing a dress, he would just have to make an appointment at the Bibbidi Bobbidi Boutique. Dad was very firm about the fact that he would allow the Tea Party, but no way was his son getting a Make-Over at the Bibbidi Bobbidi Boutique.
Mom got tired of dad calling me a sissy. She said the Tea Party was my Disney Wish and he had promised to let me have whatever Disney Wish I wanted. She told him that the next time he called me a sissy for wanting to go to the Tea Party, he would be paying for the Bibbidi Bobbidi Boutique whether he liked it or not. In our house, what Daddy says is what happens, but when Mommy gets real mad, even Daddy has to do what she says.
Three months before the trip, a few days after Christmas, there was a special Minnie Mouse envelope on the tree with my name on it. Inside, said my Disney Wish for the Disney Girl's Perfectly Princess Tea Party had been granted with a bonus Make-Over at the Bibbidi Bobbidi Boutique. I read it several times in disbelief before turning around and looking at Mommy. I had seen in the videos and read in the books about the Bibbidi Bobbidi Boutique but it was beyond even my wildest dream to get a chance to go there. I was confused however, I was a boy with short hair. What could they do with a boy there?
I looked to Mommy, she smiled and nodded her head yes. I looked to Daddy, he started to say something, but stopped when Mommy cleared her throat. He just threw his hands up and walked out of the room. I didn't understand, but Mommy told me this meant I could go to the Tea Party as a girl. She said the Bibbidi Bobbidi Boutique would ensure I was the prettiest girl there. Over the next month, after asking Mommy many more questions, I finally started to understand. I wasn't just getting to go to the Tea Party wearing girl clothes, say pink pants instead of blue, but I could have girl hair and a girl's dress to wear to the Tea Party. Daddy said I would still look like a boy in a dress, but Mommy kept telling me I wouldn't. I would look like a princess.
"Toni . . . Toni . . . Which one do you want," the Fairy Godmother-in-training asked holding out a tray with a collection of colored dots in it? "Which color do you want for your eye shadow princess?"
I looked to mom in terror. I didn't know. How was I suppose to know what color make-up I should wear. I'm a boy. Boys do not know these things. I just wanted to go to a Tea Party and be treated like all the girls at the Tea Party. I . . . I didn't know anything about being a girl. I am a boy! I am not allowed to know these things. Why are they asking me? I looked down at the selection, then at my pink painted fingernails, and finally back up to Mommy.
Mommy came to my rescue and picked the color for the eye shadow and the blush. She made me pick some jewel stickers that got put on my face with sparkles. Before they were done, they even put some lipstick on me. When they finally finished, the Fairy Godmother-in-training who was doing my hair told me to make a wish as she sprinkled fairy dust in the hair.
I closed my eyes and silently wished, ‘No one find out I am a boy. Please, No one find out I am a boy.'
They put a special pink sash on me and turned me around to look in the mirror. There was no question, looking back at me was a little girl dressed as Princess Aurora. She had bangs, with the rest of her hair going up to a bunch of hair rolled together at the top. A little tiara was around this collection of hair. Curly flowing hair was coming down out of it. There were sparkles in the hair, on the cheeks and lips. The girl in the mirror had pink fingernails, a pink dress, pink shoes, a pink sash, and blushing pink cheeks. She was very pretty. The girl in the mirror really could be Sleeping Beauty's little sister. I could be Sleeping Beauty's little sister.
Months ago Mom had tried to convince me that eight, almost nine, year old boys like me could easily pass as girls if they had different clothes and hair. I didn't believe her then, but now . . . now, I had trouble believing the girl in the mirror was a boy. But what would others believe? Surely it couldn't be that easy to turn into a girl.
"Oh look at that huge smile on our little Princess here," the Fairy Godmother who did the hair said. "You are so beautiful Toni."
I was given make-up, nail polish, and a hair brush. Mommy put them in my Pink Aurora purse and gave me the purse. I was helped down from the chair and directed over to the large mirror. I was still amazed at the image. The girl looking back at me was . . . was . . . me! I was now Toni, an eight, almost nine, year old little girl. I don't know how, but I was now a girl. Wide eyed, I looked to Mommy wanting to know how. Seeing her smile and shake her head up and down, I looked back at the mirror.
One of the Fairy God-Mothers in Training interrupted my staring, "Let's get you over to your photo shoot, so all your Royal Subjects can see what a real princess looks like."
Our next stop was the Castle Couture to get pictures taken. It wasn't far. All we had to do was cross the road behind the castle. I wasn't sure I wanted to leave the Bibbidi Bobbidi Boutique, everyone would see the freaky sissy in a dress. Get pictures, more pictures? Didn't they take enough pictures of me while they were doing my nails and hair? Mommy said the photo shoot was part of the price with the make-over. Since it was paid for, I had to do it. I was concerned about the idea of all these pictures Mommy was getting of me as a girl, but all the other girls were getting there pictures taken just as much. Is this normal for little girls to get their picture taken a lot more than boys do? I wanted a picture of me like this so I could always remember, but I didn't. How could that be? How could I want something and not want it?
We left Bibbidi Bobbidi Boutique with me holding tight onto Mommy's hand. We crossed the courtyard over to Castle Couture for my ‘photo shoot'. The dress and slip on my legs felt . . . felt . . . well I don't know what it felt like. I had never felt anything like it before. I loved it. The curly hair hanging down from the top of my head tickled the back of my neck. The shoes were flat and thin. I could feel the different bricks underneath me. Shortly before we reached the photo shop, I just started skipping. I don't know why, but it just seemed right. I had never understood why girls would just go skipping down the hall at school or in a store, but . . . wow! The hair and dress brought on a whole new feeling of enjoyment. This . . . this is fun. I let go of Mommy's hand and skipped in a circle around her as we walked over to Castle Couture.